Tough times don't last. Tough people do.
Anyone who has been following me for any length of time knows that I’ve struggled for years with a damaged metabolism. I had been a yo-yo dieter and big time cardio junkie most of my life. I did low carb, low fat, 1200 calorie diets, cleanses, other gimmicks and endless amounts of cardio to achieve a specific # on the scale, never really considering my health in the process. All these things, are things I teach my clients NOT to do because I’ve been there. Instead, I teach them health. I teach them to feel empowered without numbers. I teach them self-love. I teach them to be strong & badass.
Although, I was never obese, I was always considered chunky and always looking to lose weight. As the saying goes, one day I literally woke up and decided I wanted to learn how to do things right. I wanted to feel better, have more energy, learn how to maintain a healthy lifestyle and so on. So I hired a trainer & it took me forever to shed just a little body fat & to see inches decrease but I kept going. I kept focus on progress no matter how big or small and I never gave up, then I decided to compete in the fitness model category at a local fitness competition. I was stoked. I made it but not long after, I was also experiencing adrenal fatigue, hormonal issues, sleeping so much I couldn’t go to work some days & often sick. To say I was drained is an understatement. My body was rejecting everything I had put it through because I wasn’t paying attention to it or listening to it; all I was really after were numbers, dates, stage appearance & the rest didn’t matter.
I struggled hard during this time. It was a dark phase for me. I hated myself a lot. I hated my body even more. I hated running into people I knew. I sat in my closet and cried all the freakin’ time and no one understood because it isn’t the norm. It isn’t the norm to eat really well (clean, whole food) in a calorie deficit, to drink lots of water, to workout 4-6 x per week and still gain weight or stay the freakin’ same. It’s frustrating is what it is!! But, I overcame the dark phase. I started reading lots on self-love, on positivity and on letting go of numbers and dates and big goals and I focused inward.
A little over 2 years ago, I hired Coach Scott Abel to help me with metabolic damage. Why I waited so long, 3 years to be exact, to hire a coach is beyond me now. Why I thought I could figure this all out on my own I’ll never know but anyhow, we’ve worked on repairing my metabolism through reverse dieting. In the years before hiring Scott, I did a lot of my own research, worked on finding true balance and really listening to my body. I gave up weighing myself, focused more on health than numbers & became a certified personal trainer, nutrition coach & started my own business. Phew! Lol
My reverse dieting process is complete & this past week, I’ve started a cut/lean out process in hopes to be ready for a photoshoot this coming fall. I don’t have a date set yet but I decided the photoshoot would be a fun goal over competing again, at least for me. I’ll never say never but right now, competing is not on my list of goals. I’m excited for this process and for the change. It’ll be fun to see my body change physically & to see the muscle I’ve developed over the last few years. It’s also fun because I’ve placed no pressure on myself with deadlines, dates or scale numbers. I’m just focusing on the NOW, really tuning into my body, what it needs and having fun with it.
Everyone always wants to know what’s changed. So, to be completely honest not a whole lot. In regards to nutrition, my portion sizes have decreased slightly, my protein choices are a little more limited & dairy, except for the little cream in my coffee, has been eliminated. I am still eating 5 meals per day, still having carbs with 4 meals and so on. In regards to programming, I am working out 5x/week and following a circuit stye strength & conditioning program with no extra cardio.
In closing, it has always been my number 1 goal to repair my metabolism and have it functioning optimally. It has also been my goal to feel my best from the inside out, to really tune into my body and achieve a proper balance. Based on how I feel and where I am in this moment, coach and I feel that my body is ready for this new change and goal. My ultimate goal is to lean out, not just for photoshoot but to be able to maintain a little more of a leaner look than what I carry around currently. Will this happen? We will soon find out. How long my body will take is unknown, hence why there is no date chosen yet. I want to coax it not force it and I intend to really enjoy this process.
There is one main message that I want to get across here. It's the things we face and overcome that make us who we are. If I had never gone through this struggle, I may not have found my passion for helping other women be healthy, strong and badass. The tests we go through, show us our true strength. Our mistakes push us to grow. When you fail, stand up. Embrace the struggle and keep moving forward. Always be positive and grateful for where you are and what you’ve been given, even the trials. No one is successful without struggle.
You are stronger than you think You are resilient, capable and fierce. Keep going ….. even when it's hard.
Until next time,